Welcome to Day 10 in my Back-to-School series. I hope you’ve enjoyed a little bit of encouragement, some commiseration, and hopefully a smile or two. I’m delighted to wrap up this series with another post from Karen Ehman. When she told me her idea for this post I was delighted. You see, Karen has a heart for the child who tries his hardest and gets a C. Or the child whose appearance or figure isn’t quite compatible with whatever is “in” at her school. And I think it’s God’s heart too.
There is so much judging that goes on in schools (and everywhere really). It reminds me of a line from one of my favorite movies, A Knight’s Tale, when the bad guy says: “You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting. In what world could you possibly beat me?”
Our children face this kind of comparison every day. And little by little, they convince themselves that they don’t have what it takes. And they end up as grown women and men believing the same lie. It must grieve God’s heart to see His creation accept Satan’s stamp of “disqualified.”
So what can we do as moms? LOTS as it turns out. I hope you enjoy this refreshing approach to encouraging our children from Karen Ehman
***************************************************************
If you think back for a moment to your own school days, you’ll remember incidents when you were judged on your academic performance. Or maybe there were times you felt nervous about being socially rejected.
- Every time a homework assignment was given back to you with a letter grade written across the top.
- Each pop quiz or chapter test where you found out what percent of the answers you’d gotten right.
- Every paper that was turned in and then dotted, circled and slashed in red and returned to you to fix.
- On the play ground when kickball teams were chosen.
- In the lunchroom when you hoped you wouldn’t be left holding your tray, looking for a play to sit.
School situations are often a set up for feelings of inadequacy and rejection. How can we as moms try to combat this and make our children feel loved, accepted and successful? Try these ideas:
~ Don’t just reward high grades, also reward diligence. If your child studies faithfully Monday through Thursday for her spelling test, take her out Thursday evening for ice cream or another special treat BEFORE the Friday morning test. Tell her how proud you are of her hard work and stick-to-it attitude. Reward the work not just the final grade.
~ Occasionally slip an encouraging note in your child’s lunch. Or for fun, use a ballpoint pen to write a message on their banana or orange.
~ Send a text message to your child right before their big test in one of their classes. Tell them that you are praying for them and that, no matter the grade, they are an A + in your book! (Of course, if your child isn’t supposed to have a phone in class, try writing a note to open before the test)
~ Make a point to verbally identify the unique qualities you see in your children. Are they always careful to include others? Do they continually see the bright side of things? Do they help around the house without being asked? You may notice these qualities but how often do you stop to relay appreciation to your child? A little verbal praise for their character goes a long way.
~ Be interested in their extra curricular activities and sports (even if they aren’t something that naturally captures your interest). You may not love football but you love your child. True love is a parent who purchases “Volleyball for Dummies” or does an Internet search on an extra-curricular activity their child loves. Showing an interest in their likes shows them you love them.
~Help your child make friends. Offer to have a new friend over for supper or to drive a group of friends to the movies or putt-putt golf course. Make a special snack and let your son or daughter have a few friends over for a movie night. Help foster friendships for your kids by creating a fun and inviting place for them to hang out.
With a little effort and creativity, you can make your home and your family a place where your child knows they are loved and wanted regardless of academic performance or social popularity.
***************************************************************
Oh my, this inspires me to look for opportunities to affirm my children’s effort and good choices, irregardless of the outcome. Thank you, Karen!
This weekend Karen is giving away a signed copy of her book, A Life That Says Welcome & $10 Target card to purchase something special for kids (or yourself). To enter, please leave a comment on any back-to-school topic. Or even a prayer request. I’ll be reading them throughout the weekend and will stop and pray for each one I read. I’ll announce the winner on Monday.
While you’re at it, please stop over at Karen’s blog and say hello! She’s busy working on the launch of her newest book called Let. It. Go. How to Stop Running the Show and Start Walking in Faith. It’s not out until November, but I need it now! 
In His love,
Glynnis
Glynnis,
Thank you for sharing Karen’s post. This is so timely for me. I’m homeschooling two of my four children this year. We’re only three weeks into school, and I can already see defeat in their eyes. I have discovered that with encouragement and high fives, my daughter is already beginning to like the math she’s hated for two years. She’s realizing she CAN do it. My son, however, is thinking he’d prefer to go back to public school and the bullies where he can at least hang out with his friends. I’m finding it time to get proactive and become more of an encourager and less than a task master with him. And to find some local homeschoolers to meet at the park or something.
And I agree, Karen’s books are timely as well. I could use them, too. I’m such a control freak. And a perfectionist. Go figure.
~ Alycia
Hi , I really like your ideas. Keep up the good work!
I have two daughters, one starting middle school and one starting first grade this Fall. Thank you for the reminder of how important it is to reward the effort, not just the end result. The middle school years can be filled with so much pressure – from peers, teachers, coaches. I appreciate your ideas on how to be an unconditional supporter and cheerleader for my children. I think even a middle schooler would appreciate a note in her lunch box telling her that Mom is proud of her. And fostering a welcoming and fun environment in my home for my children and their friends is so important. Your advice will help to make this school year a much better one for my family.
Love this: “Don’t just reward high grades, reward the diligence.” As one who breezed through school with A’s and very seldom cracked a book to study, and as a mother to a child who seems to be gifted in the same way, I see the danger of entitlement creeping into character. Wise advice.
Thank you for all these wonderful back to school tips. I have really enjoyed reading them and have purchased your book, I used to be so organized. It has me motivated to get organized, declutter and take charge of my home.
I also enjoyed today’s message as it was timely to a bad grade and the discouragement that came with it!
My 11yo daughter got her first straight A report card last year but then felt terrible as her grade in 2 subjects she struggles with dropped through the rest of the year. Her teacher and I focused on her marks for effort which were almost 100% outstanding and helped her realize that that was the true indicator of how great a student she is. Grades are not as important as trying your best and showing good character.
Before school started this year I told my son that all we expect of him is to do his best and if his best is A & Bs that’s great and if his best is Cs that’s great too! My son thrives on praise so this blog was a good reminder.
After homeschooling for two years I felt God caling
me to send my koddos back to school. Its been a rough chamge for all of us. I miss my kids and knowing what they are doing and learning each day. Little sis cries each morning when her older siblings leave. She was so upset she started losing her hair. To top it off we also found out my hisband is being let go in Nov. All this change Its been hard! Thank you for this series, I’ve laughed, cried and totally related! God Bless
As a school teacher AND a mom, I really appreciated this post. Effort makes as much of a difference in the success of children as ability! It should be praised and encouraged! Thanks for all of the ideas of how to encourage and grow this in our children’s character!
At the beginning of each school year, I remind my kids to be on the look out for the new kids (and others who need help). I ask them to talk to them, play with them on the playground, invite them to join them for lunch, etc. Over the years, not only have they made many feel welcome, but they have met some of their best friends this way!
I’m a grandmother of three babies and I’ve loved your posts. I’ve had great opportunity to pass them along to young mothers of school age children and these helps work for almost every other situation of all ages. Who can’t use a dose of encouragement for a test at work for promotion, or gettting back into the work force after being down-sized? Thank you so much.
I went to 3 different high schools and was socially challenged in the aspect of making long term friends. I know the pain of peer rejection and have been making a point to step out in faith for my own children, while they are young, to encourage and uplift them. I think not only a love note, but an age appropriate verse (in case they are young, early readers like mine) would also be a great way to praise them and keep them focused on God. This could be helpful even in a public school setting, where social acceptance and critisicm can be particularly harsh with little to no faith based influence except from their home. Thank you for continuing to encourage us, as moms and women, so we can do our best to bring up good Christian children and families and enlargen the hands and feet of Christ!
Thank you so much for this series. I have cried, smiled, and been encouraged through the whole thing! I have a middle school son who struggles with school and could use some prayers. I as his mom am also struggling and not sure of how much to help and how much to allow him to succeed or fail on his own. It sure is tough to be a mom of kids that are growing up. Thank you so much for addressing this so perfectly. May God truly bless you for helping moms like me.
Thank you for this and all the other posts. It has been helpful and practical. I am requesting prayer for my five year old who started kindergarten and is having a hard time adjusting. She has cried a lot mostly everyday.
Hi!
thanks for all your post this week….i have been saving them and re-reading them via email! i have 3 kids in school from 5th thru K. My middle boy had cancer at 3 and sometimes struggles with school, but overall doing okay. Please pray for him as his, prayerfully last scans, will be this coming Tuesday, the 11th. He is a miracle, having a rare cancer, and this month marks 5 years out!!!!…please pray that his scans are clear and that his hearing would be fully restored (as lately there has been fluid that has affected his hearing). thank you so much. I am efforting to make ALL my kids feel loved and accepted everyday…just as HE accepts us!!!! Appreciate you!
Boy, I could have used some of these suggestions when my children were growing up. I will keep them in mind for when I have grandchildren.
I would be honored to have you stand with me in prayer for the future spouses of my daughter and my son. That my daughter meets a godly man and that my son is with the woman God has chosen for him to marry. Thank you!
Thanks for the reminder to praise best efforts! So much focus is placed on testing and showing academic growth at my kids’ elementary school that it’s hard not to get sucked into the frenzy of testing and grades.
I am addicited to your blog. It seems to have the topic I needed to read, the day I needed to read it. A true blessing! One if my daughters struggles with confidence and the other could care less what people think…they are twins, could not be any more different!
I found that a simple “I like the outfit you picked”, or “you are going to have a fabulous day because you are you”! Is sometimes all the boost she needs to get her in the right spirit. Only first grade, I have my hands full if this keeps up
You could keep my mother-in-law (Anita) in your prayers. She was recently diagnosed with thyroid cancer. She is a Christian. We will be visiting her soon. Please keep her and my husband in your prayers-they are very close.
These posts have been great. I especially appreciated the bullying one as unfortunately it already has started at my son’s school in kindergarten. My son is one of the tallest kids, and I’ve encouraged him and another friend who is also very tall to stand of for the smaller kids. They’ve begun the anti-bullying programs at school aleady, but it’s sad that it starts so early.
I’ve also very much enjoyed your blog since I’ve found it. As someone who married into a ready-made family with three bonus kids, and then had another, I went from being a very organized person to the complete opposite. I’m working on finding balance. It’s very much a struggle, but I’m working on it. I sure would love to have you pray for me in that area! I know it would help me tremendously to make some progress in this area! Thanks!
Your encouragement comes at just the right time…I’m so thankful He is in control and that you are willing to respond to His prompting you to share. I have three boys my oldest just started college and twins who are sophomores in high school. My emotions this school year have been crazy and your blog has provided the friend I needed. Thank you. Please pray for our twins the challenges they face during this time…security in who and whose they are, to do ther best in everything for His glory and that my husband and I would show them support and love that will enstill confidence in them.
Praising Him,
Regina
Thanks so much for this series! Our first of 4 entered kindergarten this year. I’ve gained a lot of perspective in the last couple weeks.
This is great timing – my two oldest boys are in middle school this year. My 8th grader has (oddly) never been one to worry (sometimes to a fault) what others think about him. But my 6th grader is definitely showing the signs of stress with the adjustments in middle school. He has always been easy going and cheerful, but along with puberty, has been very moody and argumentative as he stretches his wings this year. I pray for my boys, in such different ways. My girls (7 y/o twins) are already telling me about what others are wearing, etc. in school. It just seems to start so early anymore! We try to discuss more about the importance of who they are, not what they wear, but the materialism is so strong
Great message! Reading the intro brought me back to my school days and a few tears welled up in my eyes. I was that child that didn’t have a lot of self confidence (or stature). I’m still a shrimp-size at 5’2′, but the Lord has filled the void and blessed me abundantly. Walking in Faith is . . . walking down the right path.
Blessings to you all.
Oh how I love this post! My sweet shy girl struggles so with friendships. She is wise beyond her years in many ways, but a little girl at heart that still enjoys her dolls…which NONE of her friends do. She absorbs all the hurtful comments and meanness that fly around her classroom (whether directed at her or not) and brings it all home with her. I am trying to teach her to not judge the mean one (we all have bad moments, and maybe they are reflecting the way they are treated at home) AND to leave it all at the feet of Jesus. I know He loves her tender heart, and one day it will direct her footsteps I suspect, but she sometimes is such an emotional wreck that her school work, and our home life is greatly affected! Love the pre-test celebration idea!
Thinking of all the home school moms who not only need to prepare their kids for school, and be organized and all the good things mentioned in this series, but they need to be the teacher as well! They need our prayers as well!
Oh I love the ideas of going out before the test and writing on the banana! I like to write notes on the ziplock bags with a sharpie. Thank you and Karen for sharing all your ideas and your heart for organization.
My sweet 9-year-old just isn’t confident about her place in the world right now and I loved these suggestions about building her up for the process and not just the product!
This message was truly a blessing. It has touched on a situation that our family is facing currently. This is definitly food at the poper time! I am so fortunate to have Psalms 31 and all of the mothers that share helpful tips and life lessons. YOU ALL ARE AWESOME!!!!
Thank you for the back-to-school series! It came at just the right time, as my daughter started the 6th grade on August 29. This has been the first year she has not wanted to go to school. We ended last year with a move to a new home, a new state, and a new school! It wasn’t bad then, but it seems like summer erased all that and we were back at square one. it has been hard on my “momma heart” to send her off each morning, but God is faithful and He helped even through the tears — hers and MINE! I am so thankful that got to be reminded through this series that I was not alone in my transition and emotions.
Please pray for me and my girl that school (and my new job, by the way which starts today) will go well and we will both settle in and make us some friends to help along the way.
Thanks again for sharing with us!
Thank you for your encouragement this past 2 weeks. Please pray for my daughter. She has left home for the first time to attend college several hours away. It has been a difficult transition. She believed God called her there, but it has been a hard road.
I particularly like the encouraging aspect. I think this is very important, even if you think that you child is a pretty secure individual. Kids are very cruel…I learned that when I was in school, they can be harsh and judgmental. I always kind of wonder how those who judge will turn out in life. Will they be the same as adults? I guess I will get my answer tomorrow night, it is my 30th high school reunion and I’ve decided to go. I went to an all girl school and I was not in the “IN” crowd. Pray for me!! God give me strength to show them the love of Jesus!
Thank you so much for this series. Although I have thoroughly enjoyed and shared many of your posts. Today’s post really gripped my heart. I’ve been told that if you think of or consider what you could do to be a better parent than you must be already trying, but remembering what you went through at that age really puts everything into perspective. Thanks so much for sharing your heart with us. Have a blessed weekend.
I used to write messages IN my daughter’s bananas for her lunch! Use a paring knife to carve slightly into the banana peel itself. The air will turn the edges of the cut brown, making the message stand out by lunchtime, and the banana will still be intact and untouched. My little girl loved those!
I have really enjoyed your Back to School Series!!! I am the mom of three girls, the youngest who has just started Kindergarten. It has been a much easier transistion for her into the daily school routine than for myself here at home, adjusting to the empty house. I am working on trying to convince myself to take advantage of the beautiful days ahead and enjoy some of this “me” time! Your posts have been such a bright spot in my day and I am so thankful for them!
Thank you for this series. A prayer request: We have homeschooled for 8 years. Our two children have gone to public school for the first time. A 7th grader and 11th grader. It is so hard to see them not enjoying it. We have tried to impress upon them that they can serve the Lord there too. Stand up for what they believe and don’t change who they are to fit in. The 7 th grader is hearing so much fowl language, she has never heard. Please Pray for their strength to make it through as well as keeping in mind to serve the Lord. Thank you
Blessings!
I love the idea of not just rewarding the high grades, but rewarding the diligence–even before the outcome is known! We can use this in so many areas of their lives, not just grades. What a great character builder
Hi -
Thank you for the reminder that the effort should be rewarded as well as the grade. I have a high school age daughter and this year has proven to be very challenging for her academically. Normally she breezes through with straight As, however, currently she is experiencing lower grades despite her best efforts. It has been challenging for me to be enthusiastic over a lower grade, but I needed this reminder that she needs all the accolades I can give her. The Lord knew I needed this today. Again – thank you!
Great advice! I am raising a gifted 11yr-old daughter who is a perfectionist, and loved most the idea of rewarding diligence regardless of outcome. She puts so much pressure on herself – it breaks my heart. I would also appreciate your prayers for my family as we try our best to adjust to my son being away at college. We are missing him so much! Thank you for this series – it has really ministered to this mama’s heart!
Love reading this series. Please pray for me and my boys as we start our 2nd year of homeschooling next week. I want this to be an enjoyable and fun year for them full of experiences.
I appreciate all of the tips
Thank you for the tips. Saw a boy today when I was dropping my daughter off at school that didn’t fit the ‘in’ crowd. I just said a prayer for him. I know high school must be tough. While at this moment, my daughter “fits in” for the most part. I pray that she doesn’t give up what is special about her to fit in. I pray that God touches her heart and she not forget about him. This is my worry. This is also my prayer.
This is an area that I feel like I fall short. I encourage my children, but I think I make more of their final effort than the effort along the way. While reading this, I realized how blessed I am that my daughter usually does her homework without any need for my help. I don’t have to keep up with it for her, constantly try to get her to do it, she just does it and turns it in. I need to make a bigger effort of praising her for that instead of just expecting it of her. I should know better, I have two boys that are the total opposite. Thanks for the reminder to look for those wonderful things our kids do and praise them for it.
Where can i get this whole back to school series..? Ive missed a few days. Thanks!
Thank you for all the great tips! I love the idea of celebrating their diligence and not just the final grade. I agree that “school situations are often a set up for feelings of inadequacy and rejection.” Today, my daughter’s 3rd grade classmates are electing student council representatives. She is really hoping to get nominated, and I realize this is a great opportunity to affirm her no matter what the outcome of the elections. Thanks for the giveaway opportunity!
Love the ideas of rewarding before a test! My daughter is trying REALLY hard this year to keep up with her homework & studying. In years past, it was a constant battle to get her to do her homework & study for tests. So far this year has been a welcome change. She decided before school started to create her own school work chart. I don’t know if that is what has made the difference or what, but I am thankful for the change. I like the ideas in your article because I would like to reward her for her diligence in getting her work done. : )
A good friend recently advised me that my job is to build them up at home because they get knocked down at school.
For a long time I wrote lunch notes and still do. Actually I drew pictures for my kindergarter and notes for my oldest. For a while I thought they might not value them because they never say anything about my notes. Then one day I decided to ask my youngest if he wants me to stop writing notes. His reply melted my heart. He said if I had opened his little pocket on his lunch box I would see that he kept all of it!!!! I went and looked…there were all of my notes from the school year!!! Now I write/draw happily knowing that my boys do appreciate them.
I love all the great ideas in today’s post but my favorite one has got to be the one about getting the book for dummies so you can learn about what your child in interested in. My husband and I have believed for a long time that it is our job as parents to encourage a child in whatever their greatest desire is even if it is something we care nothing about.
Thank you for your article. My daughter is struggling with spelling (having to write in cursive) and your suggestions today were wonderful.
I have 2 grandchildren that I send off on the bus each day, and I pray for them each day to do their best. I love the phrase not to just reward there good grades but the diligence! My grandson struggles with his spelling so I am gonna concentrate on that and share this with my daughter and son in law too! Love your posts! Wendy
I find myself praying for my second grade grandson all day long when he goes to school. His teacher thinks he should be on ADD medicine. I don’t know if that is the right answer, but I am praying so hard for our Lord to lead us in the right direction for him. He has the kindest heart of anyone I know. I am praying for all the school kids! Please keep my grandson in your prayers also. Love this blog. Thanks for the encouragement!
Thanks for the post! It is a good reminder to be our child’s biggest cheerleader. I like to write notes to my family. It isn’t always for a special occasion…just a note of encouragement or recognition of a good well done or a thoughtful act.
I loved this post. Even though I don’t have children at this time, I do spend a lot of time with two of my nephews. I am also starting my first grad class towards becoming a teacher in a few weeks. What great encouragement to reward and uplift our children. I can apply this to all of my dear ones, big and small! I think my husband would even appreciate little notes in his lunch
).
Judgments! UGH! It happens everywhere! It has held me back from entertaining at my home, from standing tall and just a lack of confidence in myself. I so don’t want to pass this onto my children! I have had a few get togethers here at our home and everything wasn’t perfect but the conversation and time together was. Will people remember that my house wasn’t perfectly dusted and cleaned—I sure hope not. I want my kids to see a open and loving home not just for them but for all visitors. I loved reading the story at the beginning of the post—such an inspiration!!!
Thank u so much for this post! Gods amazing timing as I watchd my little guy get left without someone to sit with on the bus! And how I dislike all these football practices but my son LOves the! Thank you for theses gentle but important reminders!
Great post! Especially liked celebrating the hard work even before the test – that communicates volumes – actions sometimes do speak louder than words! Thanks!
I too loved the idea of honoring and celebrating effort and hard work before the marks, grades, outcomes are known. I wonder what that might even do for levels of anxiety and just feeling accepted regardless of what grade is given. Love the inspiring and encouraging words and ideas.
great post! this time I’ll share a request regarding this time of year. I had applied for a job this week, somewhat nervously as I realized I wouldn’t be able to be involved at the school volunteering. I read a post last week, and it completely changed my heart and put me at peace with the decision, realizing that God placed fabulous teachers in our lives this year to be with my kids. Then yesterday, I found out I didn’t get the job. We had been pretty confident that I would, and while I completely understand that that’s not where God would have me to be now, I ask you to pray that God would 1) comfort me emotionally for not getting the position and 2) show us the way He would have us to walk. I know in my head that it’s time to just move on, but my heart wants to dwell on being confused. Thanks for listening. And I’d love to be entered for the book because we love having people over for fellowship, so I could use all the pointers I can get:)
Some wonderful ideas. I have a 13 year old with Aspergers and ADHD as well as anxiety and depression. Some really good ideas that I will be able to use particularly with him. My 14 year old is struggling to find friends that are worth having. She was recently in an accident after going to a sleepover and her “friend” dragging her into a vehicle being driven by an older friend. They flipped 3 times, and praise God NONE of the girls suffered more than some bruising. That includes the “friend” who was not buckled in and was thrown out of the car. My daughter no longer has contact with this girl. She voluntarily deleted her from Facebook and her cell phone contacts. I am so glad my friend put this link up on Facebook.
Wow! Thank you for more great ideas on keeping our kids uplifted. We have never made a big issue over the kids getting straight A’s. We have always told them that if they honestly try and do the best they can we are satisfied with that. I learned a few years ago that what has helped my kids is to say wow that is an awesome grade, you should be proud of yourself. Are you proud of your success? Hopefully they say yes and then I say I am proud for you to… This avoids the idea of they must do something great to please me or anyone else. What gets hard is when they don’t feel proud and I offer my support, these extra ideas will totally help. All I know is my kids aren’t as stressed as I was in. School and even my boy who struggles achieved straight A’s last year. My goal is to help alleviate the stress on grades at home so they know that they can relax and do the best they can.
Love this post! We always encourage our kiddos to do their best, and as long as they do that then whether they get an A or a C we’re proud of them. Some things come easier to one than the other. So then they have picked up on this and encourage each other to do their best and offer to help out with the homework. Doesn’t happen everytime, but a lot of the time. I enjoy both of your blogs! Have really liked this back to school series and organizing tips! Blessings!
Thank you, I am that Mom also who cares about the little ones and how others are left out, makes my heart break for them now and it is our job to help not hinder those little ones in any way we can and especially by teaching it.
We really believe in the power of God’s Word. Our son was adopted and came with a file at least an inch thick telling of all his academic “failures”. We began to confess God’s Word over him before school, and put reminders everywhere. He had memorized the confessions by the time he was in middle school. “I have the mind of Christ, In Him I can do all things. His angels go before me and guard my back…” etc. That little guy made straight A’s on his individualized plan at a Christian Church School. He felt that he could do better because of his knowledge that he had Help while he studied. That greatly affected his effort and we are very proud of him.
How I needed this today! My older son is advanced in everything in school, so I’ve been struggling with not comparing my younger daughter to him. I needed to be reminded that school isn’t everything, there are areas that she excels in. Everyone is a child of God and will be who HE created them to be. Thank you!!!!
Love these ways to encourage my grandkids! Thank you!!
What a wonderful piece encouraging us to see the good in our children. I will share this with others and keep trying to practice the sage advice. Many thanks!
I really like your ideas & I’m passing them on to my daughter
Thank you so much for this 10 day series! I’ve learned something each day and will keep trying to make small changes. I’ve already noticed how much of a small change can make a big difference and the change has to start with me.
This whole back-to-school series has been wonderful and so helpful! Keep up the great work that both you and Karen do – it is very much appreciated!
As the parent of a son with dsylexia, God sent this post to me today! spelling tests are HARD!
I’m all for encouragement with my son that started the 1st grade this year. I think back to when I was young in school and I often didn’t have the support of my parents in activities, particularly if it wasn’t an interest of theirs. When I was discouraged, I was kind of told to snap out of it. I settled for mediocrity in school and I don’t want this to be for my son. I give him hugs and encouraging words even when he scowls and acts like those words don’t mean anything to him. Today for the 1st time I put a note in his lunch bag to tell him “I love you THIS much!” Boys and girls need to know they are valuable because they are HIS. It has to be a daily goal for us as parents. I hope by doing so this will encourage him to be his best in school and more importantly in his life.
Thank you for this great series. I will be doing this one for sure our kids get enough of the down we need to be there cheerleaders.
Thank you! I have loved, loved this back to school series! As usual, God’s timing is perfect. The best thing I’ve done this school year to keep me “together’, is to make the folder for each child (3) and refer to it often. Again, thank you! Have a wonderful weekend
Dear Glynnis and friends,
I love this posting today about encouraging our children. I am looking forward to these daily postings and I read them together with my Proverbs 31email and my devotional. These postings give me the practical side along with Scripture to back them up.
I used to be very demanding with my first two children. They were born in Spain and we moved here on military orders. They are bilingual, and I would request the use of both languages, English and Spanish, so that they would be able to communicate here in The States as well as in Spain (family and friends overthere). My third child was born here in The States with many issues ( prematurity and complications… 30 weeks), etc… It was an eye opening experience for me, and truly God’s mercy. I still insist on Spanish at the table ( breakfast, dinner…), but I do not get as upset and frustrated now as I used to. Instead, I let them speak English, even though I communicate in Spanish with them. This is a big step in my interaction with my children and daily encouragement, regardless of the language used for communication. My school notes are in Spanish, though!
Please pray for our friend’s two children who are in school with my child and attend our church. Their parents signed divorce papers yesterday. I am now picking them up after school and making sure they get home after school. It’s a hard way for kids to start a new school year.
I have really loved your back to school series. This was a good one today. My kids are, 8 year old twins, 6 year old and 15 months. Having a little one has made my older ones grow up a little more. I don’t seem to have the patience for them when the baby is crying or demanding attention. This post made me stop and I really need to encourage them to be the best they can be. Thank you!!
This was a great reminder, just what I needed as we head back to school. It’s not just about the grade but the heart and the effort behind it. Thanks!
Prayers needed for my 4th grade son and for me, to cope! He has learning disabilities and we are struggling to fing the “correct” way for him to learn. After 2 1/2 hours of studying last night, I am ready to quit 4th grade! Encouragement is a wonderful thing <3
Susan,
I will pray for you & your son. We have a son with learning disabilities also so I know where you are coming from. It is a hard thing to go thru. My son started middle school this year which brings new challenges with it.
I pray that your son will have a break through with learning this year.
Sarah
I love reading these encouraging words of advice.. I always try to remind my kids that they can make a difference in someones life, all it takes isone word or one kind action
I always try to remind my kids that they can make a difference in someones life, all it takes is one word or one kind act
My son who is now in 3rd grade – takes what his teacher says very literally and I warned him about this on the “what I should know about your child sheet”. Well, last night I got a call from his teacher. My heart was pounding – oh no what did he do??? The teacher was checking in with me but also said he was glad I mentioned that my son would take what he said literally. They were doing what is called a blind sort with spelling words with a partner and the one child was not suppose to look at the cards and then one-by-one the partner would hold up the card and the one who wasn’t looking was to point to which column it should go in. Well my child took the teacher at his word and kept his eyes shut tight so he was “BLIND” and pointing randomly on the floor where the cards should go!!! Oh please pray for patience for me that my child is not that incompetent !!!
Every Friday after school, I take my kids for an Icee to celebrate the hard work they have put in that week. We have done it since pre school. It gives them something to look forward to and they know their dad and I see the effort they have put in.
What a great series on back to school and today’s post from Karen Ehman had great ideas. I especially like the one about going out for ice cream before the test after watching your child diligently study all week. Grades are so easy to reward but it does send the wrong message and guiltily I am now watching my very oldest in college struggle to make grades instead of just learning the material (his younger brother finds it easier to do the work (and make good grades) while the older one just learned quicker and didn’t have to do so much work in grade school and now is struggling to put in the needed time). The youngest will be away at college next year and now I find myself hanging on to your awakening to realization that God has plans for me to be more than just a mom and to look forward to what my next task will be.
Thank-you for all of the thoughtful and God directed information provided in this series.
Thank you for this series on back to school! My oldest son had a hard year last year and we both were dreading a new year after having a wonderful summer break. Thanks for the encouragement for moms and kids!
Thanks for this encouraging post. My daughter is at a new school this year, so I’m working extra hard to provide opportunities for building relationships with the girls in her class. I appreciate the other tips here, too!
Thank you so much. I have really been enjoying this back to school series.
This is a very profound post and very true in perspective…these days with my kid growing up I often think back to the days that when I was growing up and wish my folks who were both working full-time had the time and knowledge to ask us and encourage us in what my siblings and I really loved…Now i can make that change with the next generation…
Reading the material today reminded me of my days in school. Having taught school I was sensitive to the students and their “performance”, trying to accentuate the positive and lifting those up who felt they didn’t “fit in”. One of the WORST things that was done when I went to school, was when our teacher handed back tests in “descending order”. Imagine how you felt when your name wasn’t mentioned, wasn’t mentioned, wasn’t mentioned, everyone is staring at you, and you are the LAST name called. It didn’t happen to me, but I SO felt for the person called last.
Thank you so much for this post!! It gave me some great ideas to use with my boys. Pray for their transistions into 1st and 4th grade this year. There have been many unexpected potholes at the start of this school year.
What a wonderful idea — wish I had done this with our children
May I use portions of this to share in our bulletin?
My kids are in college and still have some of the notes I put in their lunches and gym bags. You never know what sticks. I never knew those little things would have such impact.
My daughter has been ill for the last three years with an extremely rare condition. My prayer is that she will have the opportunity to attend a full term at her university and be well enough to complete those classes.
Thanks so much for this series! Today’s topic was very timely for my family.
I have a special prayer request for my daughter who is going through a difficult time with a friend. We have tried to be a good witness and influence to the friend and her family, but there are some issues that we are struggling with right now. My daughter is very upset about how things are currently going and cries about the situation almost every day. They are in 4th grade.
I would also covet prayers for my son who started middle school this year. He has learning disabilities and we pray for God’s hands on his future.
The timing of this post could not be any more relevant. This week, my son in 1st grade has struggled so hard at being accepted. I have tried everything and we have both had meltdowns (he is so much like me)! My husband and I are trying desperately for him to not feel so rejected at school. He is such a bright, fun-loving, and sensitive boy. He always befriends other kids and is always looking for some good ol’fashioned imaginative fun. But lately, the kids (his friends) are not so friendly. I have encouraged him to make friends with other kids and he said he’d give it a try today. Having those small rewards for efforts is something that I haven’t done quite well this week. Thank you for the reminder! Please pray for my son, Benoni, that God’s spirit will grant him peace and comfort as he manages these life events in his young life.
Dear Glynnis and Karen:
As I read what Glynnis wrote my stomach tightened and I started to feel light-headed. Left over feelings from when I was in school. I have had to learn how to get over those bad moments and feelings. Now, as my dear sweet daughter has started Kindergarten I see a lot of similar incidents creeping up on her. Who knows why she chooses to play with a girl whom I know is a “mean” girl. Does she find protection? Does it feel normal (or does she not know) that it is not okay for someone to push her off the marry-go-round? She has seen and been the victim of bullying in just the first 8 days of school. Not knowing what to say or have her do as a Kindergartner is super hard. I pray for her and pray with her and tell her to just say “that is not nice” or “that was mean” and walk away. I don’t want her to loose all the confidence and sweetness she has like I lost mine. I will continue to offer her the guidance I did not get as a child. And continue to pray for her. This (what you wrote about) has been my biggest fear. Thanks for your blog and the opportunity to “vent”. It truly helps! If I may ask, can you also pray for my daughter? Thanks!
Dear Karen and Glynnis, Thanks for the series. I found it easier to put a note in my girls bags and text to my son. I forgot my wallet going to town yesterday, so Driving very carefully around town I wasn’t able to get a lunch for my son’s track meet. I ran to the store after dropping him off and got a lunch and they had the ‘Buy 2 get 2 free” candy. I bought 4 different kids and sent him a text after I dropped off the lunch ” Candy to share” B) <3 Mom
I enjoy your wonderful back-to-school suggestions for building confidence in the hearts of our children. Although I don’t send my children to traditional school but choose to homeschool them, I love the suggestion of rewarding diligent work. We’re two weeks in to our school year and I’m thrilled with their assiduous work. For that, I believe we will celebrate with a trip to the DQ tonight!
I would like to share a prayer request. My husband has been out of work for almost 2 years. It really worked out well during summer months, as he was able to watch the 5 children while I was working. Now that they are back to school, and seem to come home with “We need Money” forms from school, I desperately need for hubby to get a job. We are willing to move anywhere and have even applied to go to S.Sudan as a director in UMCOR. Please I ask for your prayers for peace on our hearts and a job that will use his God given talents to minister to the youth and lost.
Bless you,
Jennifer
Thanks for the encouragement!!!
Thanks so much for your words of encouragement. I have 4 in public school and I teach in a public school. I am always looking for ways to encourage character and not performance. We are human beings, not human doings. I really desire to celebrate character but find myself celebrating performance instead. Thank you for your thoughts.
That is true!
Thank you both for posting your blogs, I am a single parent with issues of my own from being treated so badly at home and in school by my peers. I do a lot of reading to get the help I know I need to be the kind of parent God would want me to be. I know I fall very short at times. But I agree we need to let our children know that we are proud of them no matter what. We need to make sure they know that even if the world is throwing everything at them that they are not alone and we are there for them. There are no words to express how thankful I am for each of your blogs. Have a blessed day.
I’m a teacher and i never thought of this idea. Cool!!!
Thanks for this reminder! My son had ADHD and so his grades as well as his diligence to study are not always stellar. There are so many other things to encourage and praise him for–it’s just remembering to do it!
I have rewarded my child before he has done something good. Last year he made the A/B honor roll after a few years of struggling. Since we haven’t been able to reward him this summer (finanacial issues), I plan to do so now that school has started. It will let him know that I still have faith in him to bring home those good grade. encourage him daily and always let him know how proud I am of him no matter what the outcome is.
I really need patience this school year with the homework and with my daughter’s attitude.
Karen! Awesome as always. Your suggestions really moved me and reminds me to encourage and build up my one precious daughter who still lives at home (three are out on their own…how did we get here???). I have this one last year to do all that I can to make her feel loved, cherished…for who she is, not what she accomplishes. I really love the reward of diligence. Not much of a worldly value anymore in this high stakes college environment.
I actually have a daughter who wasn’t the A student. She went to a fabulous faith-enriching Christian college (Eastern University). She did not have the highest grades of all the kids. She was a music major and had stiff competition for every part. But this school recognized her for working hard. I was amazed. She was awarded the Alumni Award for one of two students who had progressed the most from Freshman year. That was a beautiful gift from God to her…rewarding her diligence!!!
Thank you for sharing this post! I have a son with autism, and I work as a special education teacher. It is soooooo important to reward effort! In one class, I have a student who is below 1st grade level, and all of the others are 4th grade level and above. Just this morning he read us a beginner book, and the whole class cheered for him! Living with a child who also struggles puts me dealing with this 24/7! I have enjoyed your series.
Lunch has been a challenge this year with my youngest starting school, but we’re trying some new items in a thermas and so far having success!
Thank you for this post! Great practical ideas. Please pray for adequate after school care and juggling of schedules to accommodate new timelines as SEpt starts.
Thank you for your encouragement! Following God’s Word to train our children and raise them in this world takes alot of patience and encouragement for each other. I would just again like to thank you and also ask that you pray for my children’s teachers. They attend a Christian school and the teachers are just amazing. I would just ask that you will pray for encouragement, strength and wisdom for them. They are so devoted to our students. Thank you and have a great weekend!
I just love your blog!!!! I really needed to read some inspiring words today about my children and giving them encouraging words. I have a forth grader this year, sixth grader,and freshman in high school and it seems like so overwhelming these days for kids.
Our five year old was punched and bulleyed on his second day of Kindergarten last week. Would cherish your prayers.
One day last year, my eigth grade daughter scored well on a really hard test. Her teacher wrote on her paper: “Smile and be proud, Carly!” I loved that so the next morning when I dropped her off at school, I said to her “Smile and be proud!”. She perked up and gave me a little grin and off she went. I did it again the next day and soon it became our regular parting words. Even today, she stands up a little straighter and goes into her day with a smile. Those words remind her of a time she was successful and that she can be proud of who she is no matter what happens each day. Great post. Thanks!
This year I have a junior in high school and one in Kindergarten. This was a great post for both ages. I need to get better at verbally identifying their unique qualities – thanks for that reminder!
I really liked the part about rewarding diligence and praising things that are part of their character. I read recently about a trick of writing on a banana with a toothpick. After about an hour the toothpick writing will turn brown, and your message will be revealed
thanks for the encouragement. I have 2 very different children. A homeschooled second grader who is brilliant, but doesn’t always try her hardest. And a 4 year old who was just diagnosed with autism. It has been a rough few weeks.
I need to remember to praise my younger sons efforts. It is tough to follow in the footsteps of an academically gifted. Rother.
Thank you for the wonderful posts. I am learning a lot thru them.
I am a teacher–if your hardworking child has a teacher that does not occasionally reward diligence, ask them to. I have to give grades-it is the nature of my job but I make a point of every now and then having grades that reward the hard work shown in class. My students keep journals and the hard work they put into that is reflected in the grade-not the rightness or wrongness of the editing work but that they TRIED.
Thank you for these encouraging words on how to encourage my boys. We get so wrapped on the final products of our work that we never look at the process and how hard they are working….
I can’t wait to read the ‘Let it Go… stop RUnning the show…’ book. I have a problem with wanting everyone to see MY VISION….that I have a hard time stepping back.
First, thank you so much for this encouraging back to school series. All three of my kids are in college this year, but our middle child, who has ADHD, has always struggled to stay organized and to keep up with his work. After reading some of your posts, yesterday I called my son and just chatted with him about how school was going, what was his favorite subject, favorite teachers, etc. I really worked to encourage him to do his best, and to remember that we were behind him 100% and really wanted God’s best for him. Thank you for helping me to remember that I need to reward his efforts and not just the result.
Thank you for a wonderful and timely series. I too get caught up in the finished product of a school assignment or test and sometimes forget how much effort went into it. This is often more important even than the end result. Hard work is an important skill to have throughout our lives.
What excellent ideas, I will definitely save this in my special emails and look back on it when my kids are in school. I have Pre-schoolers and I remember looking back to when I was in school and wishing now my mom would have one some of the things you have suggested. Our kids don’t have it easy in school these days and what a difference we can make as parents. Thank you for your devotions and the great ideas.
God bless,
Emily
Thanks for this reminder. I have 3 boys and each is definitely on a different point of the intellectual line (ranging from my oldest who just happens to have DS and unfortunately has the “it’s easier to live down to someone’s expectations that it is to live up to his potential” attitude, my middle son is in the gifted range and my youngest who could be a straight A student but prefers a much more laid back approach to school work). I like the idea of rewarding diligence and I think my youngest will respond to it too!
Thank you for all your hard word. I have enjoyed reading all of these topics – and plan to put many into practice!!
I love the idea of encouragement and celebrating the diligence before the test! So many times we celebrate an end result but the practice, study, organization before is so important. I have a little one and a preschooler now so I’m going to have to keep this idea in my mind for future use. Might use it on the preschooler soon though! Thanks for the series!
Love this post, we are a military family who move every two or so years. You know the saying ” home is where the Marine Corps sends you”. Well that’s us and we have two kids and have had a few new homes, schools, and friends. This post was great and will really help during our transitions and settling down.
Love this post, thanks for all the amazing ideas they will come in soooo handy.
Thank you for your back to school words of encouragement. I want to be my son’s greatest encourager and sometimes I fail at that. Thank you for your prayers.
Glynnis,
I’ve enjoyed all your Back to School articles. I am a grandmother of six and five are in school. I hope their mothers as well as other mothers will take the time to read this. I’m posting it to fb.
Blessings
Thanks for your back to school posts. They have been encouraging & practical. I have been working hard at keeping a menu & tried some of the recipes. I have 4 kids in school now & one daughter is a perfectionist & pleaser. Any thoughts on how to help her do her best but not let it consume her?
Blessings on you & Karen,
Christy
Thanks for everything you ever write. I’m going to reread them and pass them along to friends that homeschool. Thanks!
Although my daughter is only 16 months old, I am going to print out Karen’s ideas. Just reading through the blog and looking back at my childhood, a little encouragement goes a long way in a child’s life. Thank you. God Bless.
Wow! What an eye opening post! Those are great tips to help me further encourage my daughter as well as myself! I love the idea of rewarding the work not just the grade. My daughter is only 6, but has already set her bar high! She does very well in school and is well liked, but can be critical of herself. I want to build her up strong and confident and to know God. Please pray for us, for patience, understanding and strength.
Thanks for the wonderful encouragement & perspective for us Mom’s !
I ask for prayer for my youngest son! He is out 4th child, but the first that we are encountering any difficulty in learning. My husband and I are constantly evaluating and re-evaluating our choices with him when it comes to learning. When do you take away extracurricular activities because academics are suffering? It just does not seem fair that the kids who need to be outside and active have to study harder to keep up with the class. I love the idea of rewarding for studying! I am implementing it immediately! Thanks for all the encouragement for moms!
I am a public school teacher and just finished my first, full week of school with my PreK children… we spent most of our time strugging just to get the routines down pat, so we can get down to the business of ‘playing to learn!’ I am happy to report that our whole school is using a brain-smart method with LOTS of encouragement rather than punitive correction! And, also happy to see the fruits of our labors begin to ‘jell’ so early in the year! But, I’m exhausted!! Please pray for us as we continue down this marvelous path that God has set before me!
Thanks!
~K
A prayer for my college and high school students who are trying to find their way.
Please pray for my 17 year old daughter. She is in her senior year of high school and struggles often with the environment in her school. She is very conscious of how she might be perceived and how judging goes on every day. I remember how it was when I was in high school, but it has to be so much worse now than in the late 80′s!
thank you for the awesome pointers for our grandchild, who is in middle school. blessings
Please pray for me to keep my calm and control as my oldest adjusts to full day kindergarten and all of my children have been getting up way too early! I struggle with my morning attitude as it is and I am working on it with some progress, but wow does this first week of school test it to its limits! Pray for my children to find peace in our new routine with school and for me to help them adjust with calm and control that God gives me! Thank you all for your timely wisdom.
May I just say, this back-to-school series has been so helpful to me. I put my homeschooler into some pretty tough college classes just as this series was beginning. At first, I thought of back-to-school pertaining to elementary and kids who actually went off to school. We have never been through a lot of the trials you heroes have been through. I never had to wave goodbye to my little child, while I cried my way through the day. We haven’t had to rush through breakfast more than once or twice a week. Then, I began to notice how much every single post now pertained to me. My son was nearly grown, and I have to let him go, to protect him through prayer now, to trust God with his future. I am struggling to lay this burden at my Father’s feet, and I appreciate so much knowing other moms out there feel the same way every day. God bless you all, my sisters of motherhood. Happy school year! Go TEAM!
One thing that’s become a tradition in our house is having a special cake ready after school every year on the first day of school (I make a layer cake with frosting and M&M’s all over it – nothing fancy, it’s a box cake mix – but the kids love it covered with M&M’s). I started this when my first child went to Kindergarten and now my last child is a junior, but I’m still making the M&M cake! It is the best time to hear all about their first day – it’s amazing all they share over a treat! It also reinforces to them how special they are!
I really like the list of suggestions and all the different ideas! Praying for my children daily to come to know the Lord and to have hearts of compassion for all, to be drama free.
As a former teacher and now a stay at home mom I think you saved the best for last. To often I saw parents only rewarding excellent behavior or straight A’s — what child can compete with that all the time. Some times kids mess up and they need to be shown Grace. They need to learn from their mistakes young that way it wont become a major problem when they are older. I love all of this.
I really like your idea of rewarding the effort BEFORE the test as a way of encouraging your children. I try to emphasize that as long as they have tried their best, that’s what counts. Thanks for sharing such great ideas!
Back-to-school praise report – my youngest started full day long twice weekly preschool, my oldest started full day week long kindergarten and I started a part-time nursing position while both kids are in school. Thank you Lord for these healthy full-of-life children that you have blessed me with whom medical professionals said would never be. I am so blessed!
Thank you for this great message! My son is a second grader this year, and does not like school. He struggles with learning and retaining. Therefore he becomes discouraged. Will you please pray for God to help me support him with his learning style. And to have the ability to encourage him. And my hope for him to one day like school…In Jesus precious name, I pray. Amen.
My daughter is starting preschool next week. I’m excited but can’t believe how fast she is growing.
Thank you, Glynnis for sharing Karen’s post. It is so simple in hindsight and a great “a-ha” moment. I will incorporate Karen’s suggestions into my interactions with my children during the school year. Another thank you for your wonderful blog. I love your blog and read it every day (although sometimes I’m a day or two behind). Yours is one of my favorites. Could you please pray for my husband and I? We’re just starting to look at houses again after losing our home to foreclosure and going through a bankruptcy a few years ago. We’re starting over (currently living with his parents). I’m so confused as to what we should do. I won’t go into all the details, but perhaps just praying to God for his help with our decisions (there are so many things to think about: financial, our children, schools, etc.). Thank you!
I really appreciated this reading. No matter how old your children are ( even my grandchildren are out of school ) you will always be able to find some child to encourage. Can you tutor someone in need? Give mom a break to shop w/o her child? You get the idea. You will be blessed while being a blessing to someone!!!
Thank you for the excellent post and tips on encouraging our children. We started a new school this year and God has been so faithful…I praise Him for how He walks with us in all the details of life, especially big changes. We’re all experiencing what it means to trust Him more. Thanks for allowing God to speak through your blog. It is a blessing.
As an educator and mom of three children, I loved your post! We must remember that all children are different and they won’t all get that 100% no matter how hard they try! Thank you for your thoughts!!
This has been a very helpful series. My child is struggling at school, especially with the social aspects. There are older kids picking on him and he is having extreme difficulty dealing with that along with the struggle of school work consentration and interpersonal relationships. He could sure use some extra prayers!
OH….to remember the old days. How soon we forget how hard it was when we were not the popular kids. I am going through my second childhood – raising grandchildren. Tough job. It’s hard not to smother (and embarrass) them with the grandmother kisses at the bus stop or school. Things are a little different than when my children went to school. But some things are still the same……children wanting to be liked and trying to fit the mold of being accepted. Thanks for sharing some ways we as parents, grandparents, etc. can help and encourage our kids get through the every day struggle of being the person God created instead of trying to be the person the world wants us to be. God Bless.
Hi,
I only have 2 kids. My first born finished school and now works full-time as a cataloguer in a library service company. My youngest started high school this school year. My husband and I have always encouraged him with his best is all we ask. Reward for effort is a big kicker, too. He had a rough start in Grade 8 last year, but his teacher pulled us in and called him out. It was all he needed to pave the way for responsible student-hood. Now he looks back and thank God for his teacher and, of course, parents
Thank you so much for this post. Great ideas of ways to encourage my kids. I love the idea of rewarding dilegence not just great grades.
Wow – what a great reminder that encouragement is not only needed by our children, but such a good motivator for all of us. Did I get away from being encouraging and recognizing efforts? How did that happen? I am such a firm believer in the power of your words, especially encouraging words. Thanks for the friendly reminder!! Thanking God that He doesn’t expect me to be perfect and praying He helps me remember not to expect it of my son! =0)
Thank you for these great ideas! My daughter still loves notes in her lunch and she’s in 6th grade. Apparently they’re not too cool for middle school! I can relate to Traci above…my daughter cried for 6 weeks straight in both 1st and 2nd grade and I was expecting tears when transitioning to 6th. So far we have had them every night too. But, she is starting to see two things – the power of prayer and that everything really is ok. She gets anxious at night and just before school but when she comes home she’s had a great day! Frankly the roller coaster is exhausting! I was told that just listening and not trying to fix things and staying on my knees in prayer would help and honestly those two simple, ‘already knew that’ strategies have worked for us. It’s still not easy, we’re only two and a half weeks into school, but it’s been slowly getting better. I’ll be praying for all those kids who are still overly anxious about school changes.
I love the idea of rewarding them Thurs night, for a test they have Fri. I know my daughter has a lot of pressure to always ace her spelling test on Fri. It is sort of expected now that she does. I will try this to take some of the pressure off of her.
Our daughter ran track for the first time last spring. I know nothing about track times or skills. But we both knew we just had to support this effort. We were at all of her meets, cheering her on. I was soooooooooo proud of her. She never placed but she worked really hard. She will be continuing on this spring. Again, so proud of her.
Thank you for the great way to reinforce the good behavior and building our children up. I will try to search for other ways as well. Have a blessed weekend!
Please remember my husband Scott. One of his largest accts is making management changes, which is leaving a lot of uncertainty in the future of this acct. yesterday was very stressful for him. A son changing careers which will be added pressure for my daughter-in-law; another son working on his masters, working long days, which causes stress on another daughter-in-law; daughter hoping to get into a program next month to work on masters; youngest son going to college and working full time. We still try to get together every Sunday for lunch so that we can all be together. I am so blessed with a wonderful husband, great kids and spouses, and precious grand children. Thank you for praying for our family.
I definitely find myself hearing things people said to me in school when I was young, even as an adult. Some of those things really stick with you. I love your ideas to help my daughter have a stronger foundation than I did, so that, hopefully, she will be able to discern helpful criticism from just, plain meanness.
I have been blessed with a smart daughter, but i agree that we sometimes get too interested in the numbers and the successes and forget about the child!
What great suggestions for encouraging kids in their activities! My kids’ big activity was showing cattle (I don’t know if that qualifies as extra-curricular, haha) and I think I should write “Cattle Showing for Dummies”! In all the years they showed cattle I never did develop “the eye” for spotting the great one. But I was always there cheering them on and taking pictures. Whether they won or didn’t do so good, we praised the effort and hard work that went into getting ready for that show–just like kids who practice their sport faithfully no matter how much they play or how the team does. It matters to the kids that we are there! The won’t always “win” in life and we are teaching them life-skills and life lessons when we praise them for their effort no matter the outcome.
Shelly I completely understand – they should also have “Showing Meat Goats for Moms!” But do your kids find it hard to fit in?
Thank you for this series! There has been so much that has stood out for me. Mostly, Creating a Welcoming Home that begins with ME. I need to let go of so many high expectations on my family as well as myself, and just allow grace to soak in and surround us all. This message has hit home as well. I find that I am not giving nearly enough encouragement to either of my boys. To be honest, they both lack in the effort department, but if I begin to notice and praise the smallest of things, I think we will all feel so much better. And I know that it will greatly increase their self worth and confidence! Again, thank you!
I am raising 2 country boys – animals included, they are involved in 4-H and scouts and youth group, but they somehow don’t feel that they fit in because they like the animals and agriculture rather than NFL football or brand name clothes, or computer games or having a touch Ipod. They have parents with a cell phone not a smart phone. I pray for a way to help them make friends that will stand by them through think and thin. I pray for a way to make school easier for them and not something that they dread daily.
Thank you for this post! My oldest son is in 6th grade.( first year of Jr.High) I find myself remembering back to my years in school. Wanting to hang out with friends (that often involved judgement or peer pressure) It was such a rough time for me. I went to church and prayed, but didn’t have a relationship with Jesus. I want my son to have a heart for Jesus without his peers judging him like they do. Please pray that he continues to follow the word of God and love God with ALL of his heart. That he will not listen to the judgement for loving and worshiping our Father!
Thank you!
P.S I would love this book.
Just pray that our kids can stand up against the temptations that they face during the school year…
What a timely message! My 16 year old daughter is working part time by choice and comes home after a long day of school and work to start to study at 9pm. Thank you for reminding me to applaud her diligence and dedication!
WOW, so glad I found your blog, what wonderful ideas – as a mom of two kids with extremely special gifts, I am encouraged by what I am reading. My children struggle with the everyday issues every kid does, along with the struggles they face because of their learning challenges. My daughter was adopted at age 5, after suffering a traumatic first 3 years and a closed head brain injury. Her progess has been remarkable. My biological son was born premature at 28 weeks weighing only 1 lb 13 oz. He’s 16 now and taller than I am! He has Asperger’s Syndrome and is very high functioning. It was a real eye opener when I took both kids to a specialist in Brain Integration Therapy – she looked at me and said, “wow, you really have your hands full!” I was like “WOW you are right!” I felt validated!! My children are phenomenal and it is my total privilege to be their mother, and some days it’s just all alot. Thanks for your blog where support and encouragement is always available!!
Thanks for all the great resources offered here. I need them
desperately to help me manage my home. God bless you
all for the effort.
Thank you so much for this post! I have twin boys, that are 6th grade and starting a new school! It has been a major adjustment for them with a lot of homework. This school grades harder than the public schools and so they are discouraged, and feel that they aren’t doing well. We have had tears everyday. We also have a 5 year old, who just started Kindergarten. Would appreciate prayers, just for peace and to still find joy and laughter!
Thank you,
Traci Gillen